Normal grief follows a period of days, weeks or months and every person has their own rate of processing the loss. For some people, grief may last for several days or weeks and they may be finished with the process, for others the grief can be experienced for a significantly longer period of time. The duration of grief will also depend on the nature of the loss. Grief is different to depression. You can read more about depression here.
Mental health practitioners indicate that there are four broad stages for grief.
We can label the first stage of grief as the “Outcry.” This is when the initial impact of the loss is felt. People in this stage often react physically by crying, sobbing or tearing their clothes. This stage does not often last for a long period of time.
The second stage is referred to as a stage of “Denial and Intrusion.” During this period, normal life goes on and the individual may forget their grief for short periods of time, then the impact of the loss will reappear and the feelings of grief may re-emerge, only to subside again.
The third stage of grief is often referred to as a period of “Working Through.” During this stage, the individual is working toward acceptance of the loss. Memories of who or what has been lost become less intense and the grief becomes a dull ache, rather than an intense stab of surprise and pain.
The fourth and final stage of grief is sometimes referred to as a stage of “Completion.” In this final stage of grief, the individual experiences full acceptance of the loss and moves on with life. If the loss is due to the death of a loved one, then the individual is able to think about them and have memories of them without falling apart or feeling intense pain and loss. (This article is electronically protected – Copyright © Associated Counsellors & Psychologists Sydney PTY LTD)
Most of us do not follow a linear process as we go through these stages of grief, instead we go back and forth between “denial and intrusion” and working our way through the loss, until we are ready to reach “completion.” However, for some people, the process becomes stuck and the intense feelings of grief do not recede over time. Psychologists refer to this as Complex Grief or Pathological Grief.